How to Resolve Marriage Fights

But far be it from me to boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world. ESV Galatians 6:14

Usually I write my posts the night before, but the post from a week ago I actually wrote the week before (I somehow got ahead!). As such, the post on “Hold Fast to Your Wife” was not on my mind last week. Instead, what was on my mind was how annoying my wife was being. I forget what we were fighting over, but all day, I was not on good terms with my wife. Interestingly enough, she came across my blog and read it, and of course was seething inside that I would write on the importance of holding fast to your wife all while giving her a cold shoulder. How could I fail so fast?

I believe it was the Puritans that spoke of the importance of preaching the gospel to yourself every day. Somehow last Wednesday, I failed to preach the gospel to myself, and Satan took every advantage to allow me to turn a cold shoulder as my wife struggled with the tension between us. By God’s grace, as the day wore on, He began to convict me of my self-centered nature, and we were able to work through things that night. However, it was only through recognizing the power of the gospel that either of us was able to move toward the other.

Constant, daily meditation on the death and resurrection of Christ is a crucial part of our spiritual formation. Not only does it remind us of what God has done for us, but more importantly it puts our heart in a position to receive His grace. Even more, it allows God to work through our hearts to move us closer to others and allow us to be Christ on earth: bringing restoration and grace to others…just as we have received from Him. Is there tension between you and your spouse? Can I encourage you to start by preaching the gospel to yourself? Review what Christ has done for you, and then see if that doesn’t put you in a position to fight for your marriage. I’m praying for you.


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